12 COMMON MISTAKES MADE IN A RELATIONSHIP

I've talked recently on relationships and marriage and what to do to keep your relationship from becoming dysfunctional and withering away. Now, I would like to talk to you about some of the common mistakes people make causing strain or discomfort on a relationship.

Since we know I am no expert on relationships, I quickly hit up my faithful facebook friends and networking circle for some suggestions. Normally I don't get a lot of feedback on my post but this time was different. It seemed as if people were eager to to give feedback on their past relationship trouble they experienced. After reviewing all the post I came up with a list of 12 common mistakes made in relationships. Here we go!

1. Expecting your partner to read your mind
2. Letting passion die
3. Taking your partner for granted
4. Thinking you are always right or you know it all
5. Playing the martyr (the one who always gives in at all cost)
6. Openly criticizing/judging your partner
7. Comparing your relationships to other relationships
8. Over-Analyzing
9. Being dishonest about your past, present, or future
10. Trying to change your partner
11. Emotional manipulation such as blame, guilt, or anger
12. Over crowding or being too demanding or needy...controlling due to past insecurities.

Wow, I'm guilty as charged on many accounts! So, with that said why are these mistake so commonly repeated in many relationship? We all at some point in time have committed one or more of these mistakes. Most of the time we are unaware of these actions, and if you are like me you hate to be called out on them as well.

Since I am guilty as charged on many accounts I started thinking and done some talking to some honest friends and I realized why we tend to make these common mistakes...FEAR and INSECURITY from past relationships. I pulled out my notes from my blog on fear. FEAR is simply a perceived loss of control. OUCH! When our fears start to take control we look for a safety net, something secure. Once we loose that security or safety net we start to experience the feelings of hurt, anger, and resentment especially if we worked really hard to make the relationship work. If that fear and pain is not dealt with we end up caring it with us into our next relationship. All that hurt, insecurity, and fear causes us to unconsciously make these common mistakes, setting us up for yet another heartbreak.

After taking all this in for a few moments all I was left with was we need to be open and honest with our partners, and we need to deal with our past demons. Once we are aware of the things we do wrong or our mistakes we can begin to change that behavior and move into a fulfilling and exciting relationship that will last. EXPRESS DON'T SUPPRESS! So, stop repeating those same mistakes and suffering from relationship to relationship. Start now and sit your partner down and talk to each other. Open and honest communication is the key and the beginning!